


if you fly too close (you fall down to the ground)

by freckleder



Series: Tsukkiyama Month 2017 [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood and Injury, M/M, Quidditch, TsukkiYama Month, it's just a minor injury and not very graphic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-11-07
Packaged: 2019-01-30 21:39:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12661929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freckleder/pseuds/freckleder
Summary: Kei had been in fights with his boyfriend before, but not like that. It didn't take him long to come to the realization that it might have all been his fault though.





	if you fly too close (you fall down to the ground)

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is written for Tsukkiyama month 2017.  
> I will write one fic each week and pick the prompt that I enjoy the most of that week, so the day I publish the fics isn't necessarily going to correlate with the date that the actual prompt was due. 
> 
> Week One: Harry Potter AU

An owl sat on Kei’s arm and tried to nibble at the parchment paper he was writing on. He didn’t stop it from doing so.

He was sitting on the last steps of the stone staircase up to the owlery and tried to write something, while using his knees like a pad underneath. It was already a mess and an owl chewing the ends off wouldn’t change that. It wasn’t meant to be read by anyone, so Kei didn’t care. He was just pretending to write a letter so in case someone would come up to the owlery, they wouldn’t ask him why he was just sitting around. Usually he’d go to the library to brood and hide away, but what he had needed in that moment was a remote place, without people, to sort out his thoughts.

A gust of wind was ruffling through his hair and almost ripped the parchment out of his hands. He gripped it tightly. The owl fluffed its feathers and hopped up from Kei’s arm to his shoulder. It snuggled closer to him to protect itself from the wind.

“At least you don’t hate me, huh?” he said with a sad laugh.

He had fought with Yamaguchi. They had fought before, but not like that. It had ended with Yamaguchi shouting at him to leave because he didn’t want to see his face _‘now or any time in the future’_ and Kei had complied with pleasure and stormed out of the common room.

They broke up. Correction, Yamaguchi broke up with him. Although it had stayed unsaid, Kei could read between the lines. The tone of his voice had said it. The hurt look in his eyes had said it. It pained Kei just to think about it. He hadn’t seen Yamaguchi lose his temper like that before.

He supressed the urge to throw the inkpot over the edge of the tower, just to see it tumble down and shatter into pieces on the roofs of Hogwarts. They had fought about Quidditch. He should have never started playing that cursed sport, it had caused him nothing but problems. Not only had it caused the distance between him and his brother, now it had also cost him his relationship.

Their fight had been so stupid. Every morning Yamaguchi would drag him to the Quidditch field to practice on their own for the match against Slytherin and he didn’t get that there was no point of doing so. They lost the past five matches against them, and no matter how hard they practiced, the Slytherin team was practicing too, so how should they ever be able to catch up? It was a waste of time. He was just trying to protect them from suffering even more from yet another loss, why didn’t Yamaguchi understand that.

Kei shook his head. He hadn’t been paying attention to his quill, lost in thoughts, and had doodled mindlessly ahead. What a waste of parchment paper.  

They said that after a breakup, distance was healing. Kei scoffed. Easier said than done. Not only did he share classes and the same common room with Yamaguchi, but Quidditch practice as well. They even used the same bedroom. He couldn’t avoid Yamaguchi forever. He didn’t _want_ to avoid Yamaguchi forever.

The owl on Kei’s shoulder cooed, then it lifted off and flew back into the owlery. Kei screwed the inkpot close and put it away, together with his quill and parchment paper. It was almost time for dinner, so he headed to the Great Hall.

He scanned the Gryffindor table. Yamaguchi wasn’t there yet. Kei didn’t know where to sit. Usually when they fought, he didn’t talk to Kei but he still sat next to him wordlessly. He spotted Kuroo and Tanaka at the end of the table. He took a seat, a bit closer to Tanaka than necessary, so there was enough space next to him for another person. Just in case.

“Yo, Tsukishima. Where’ve you been, I haven’t seen you all day around?” Tanaka asked. “Did it have something to do with that fight with Yamaguchi in the morning?”

“Shhh,” Kuroo said and kicked him under the table.

Kei, who had been pouring himself a glass of orange juice, stopped in his tracks. He had hoped that most of them were still asleep and hadn’t heard them, but his prayers had fallen on deaf ears. So rumours travelled fast, huh. “No, why do you ask?” he gave Tanaka a dangerous smile.

“You both got really loud, I was afraid that the common room would be in flames and ashes,” Kuroo said with raised eyebrows. “Everything was still intact though, so I figured it couldn’t have been that bad.”

“Oh sorry, we’ll try and put on a more impressive show next time. Flames and fireworks are added to the list, thanks for your input.” Kei gave him a look before he grabbed a ladle and put some pumpkin soup in his soup bowl.  

He kept stirring it, the pieces of bread that he had thrown in already turning soggy. He pretended like he watched the candles float around, while he kept throwing glances at the door that led to the common rooms. There he was! Yamaguchi walked side-by-side with Hinata, talking animatedly about something that had to be Quidditch related. Kei’s heart felt like it was being squeezed together and wrung out like an old towel.

They walked straight in their direction. Kei was suddenly very fascinated by his soup and stared at it as intensely as possible. He did glance up every few seconds to see if Yamaguchi would come to their side.

Yamaguchi was already relatively close to them, when he caught him staring and their eyes met. He raised his eyebrows at the empty seat next to Kei, then turned his head purposefully away and guided Hinata to the other end of the table.

This was new. Kei’s soup had lost all taste but he ate it nonetheless. He hadn’t missed Yamaguchi’s puffy eyes though and for some reason he felt even more awful than before.

“Wow, that was harsh just now. You really messed up, didn’t you?” Tanaka asked. “What did you do to make him this angry?”

Kei gave him an icy look. He wasn’t in the mood for this conversation.

“Are you all right?” Kuroo’s smirk had vanished from his face and he gave him a genuinely worried expression. Him being the vice-captain of their Quidditch team was showing again.

He didn’t know whether Kuroo was asking about him personally, or their relationship. He shrugged because the answer to both was ‘no’.

Tanaka and Kuroo exchanged looks. No snarky reply from Kei was so against their expectation, it got them worried.

“You should talk to Yamaguchi. Things said at 6am in the morning, before breakfast and coffee, are never truly what you mean to say,” Kuroo said. He rested one arm on his head and watched Kei. “I’m not just saying this for the sake of our team, but for both of you.”

Kei bit his lip. Why did Kuroo always have to hit the nail right on the head? “I might have said things I didn’t mean to, but I’m not sure if I can fix this. Or how.”

He had messed up.

Kei didn’t necessarily think that he was wrong about the match, but he could’ve said it in a more diplomatic way. Not in an annoyed voice right after waking up in the morning, knowing that he would have to sacrifice the entire afternoon catching up with his homework, because they spent so much time practicing. He had taken his stress and anger out on Yamaguchi.

“You’ll figure it out. And I suggest before the match against Slytherin, because Daichi is going to give you hell if it affects your playing.” Kuroo shrugged like it was up to Kei to pick his poison.

 

* * *

 

When Kei walked into the dormitory, Yamaguchi was already in bed, reading. He didn’t look up when Kei entered. His bed was to Yamaguchi’s right. Only the curtain to his side was pulled shut. Kei swallowed hard. He _wanted_ to talk to Yamaguchi, but he didn’t know how. He doubted that he would even listen to him at this point.

Kageyama, with the bed on his other side, gave him a curt nod, which Kei returned. Stacks of Quidditch magazines were piled up next to his bed and his favourite team was dashing around in the wallpaper next to it. Kei didn’t get his obsession with Quidditch.

His own bed was simple. No posters, just two blurry pictures of him and Yamaguchi, taken in Hogsmeade last winter. He went to bed early, hoping that a new day would bring an opportunity to apologize.

 

* * *

 

Kei woke up early the next morning, precisely at 6 am. It was the time he’d get up every day with Yamaguchi to practice. Yamaguchi was still asleep, the curtain to his side was still closed. He refused to let the feelings of regret and guilt wash over him this early, so he pressed his head into his pillow and tried to not think about anything.

It must’ve worked, because the next time he opened his eyes it was 7:30 am. Yamaguchi’s bed was empty, and so was everyone else’s. Kei got up, ruffled through his hair once, which counted as styling it, and put on his uniform. He had been late to classes often enough to be able to tie a tie while half-walking half-running down the stairs, so it didn’t take him long to get dressed.

Kei thought about skipping breakfast, but he decided to have at least some coffee and a toast so he wouldn’t have to sit through his classes with an empty stomach. It wasn’t just because of the countless times Yamaguchi had lectured him that it was important to eat _something_ in the mornings.

He was just taking a sip of coffee, listening to Noya ramble about his new broom, when his stomach turned. Maybe he should’ve skipped breakfast after all. His eyes immediately caught Yamaguchi in his fiery red Quidditch uniform, his hair tied into a messy half-ponytail to keep it out of his face. Hinata was two steps ahead of him, also sporting the Quidditch uniform.

Kei took another gulp of the bitter coffee. So Yamaguchi had already found another training partner. Good for him, Kei thought, but not even in his own brain could he stop it from sounding sarcastic. Yamaguchi’s eyes weren’t looking as puffy as the day before, but he was paler than usual. Kei wondered if he had gotten enough sleep.

“Aren’t you going to eat?” Noya asked after Kei hadn’t answered him in a while.

Kei shook his head. “No, I think I just lost my appetite.”

 

* * *

 

In his classes Kei teamed up with Kageyama. It was a surprising development, but when they were asked to work in teams of two, he had gotten up and sat down next to him without Kei even having to ask. He wasn’t sure if Kageyama and Hinata had decided to split up during teamwork, or if Hinata had simply ditched him for Yamaguchi as a temporary practice partner.

It dragged on for three days. Yamaguchi kept ignoring him and Kei was at a loss at what to do. He couldn’t force him to listen to him, and there were rarely any opportunities when they were alone.

He missed Yamaguchi. Doing his homework by himself almost bored him to sleep and he even caught himself thinking about game strategies for their Quidditch match. He hadn’t realized how much Yamaguchi’s presence had brightened his days, had school always been this bland without him?

 

* * *

 

Kei was just walking back from the library when he ran into Kuroo. He nodded at him and was about to pass by him, when Kuroo stopped him and pulled him to the side.

“Listen, what was that today?”

Kei sighed. He had to be referring to his abominable play during Quidditch practice. “I don’t know, my head was somewhere else.” Kei had gotten changed in lightning speed and had left before any of them had even reached the changing room.

“You haven’t talked to Yamaguchi yet, right?” Kuroo gave him a reproachful look.

“No.” Kei sounded tired. “I haven’t had a chance to yet.”

Kuroo leaned against the cold wall behind them. “You know that this isn’t just about you apologizing to Yamaguchi.”

Kei tilted his head to one side. He didn’t quite follow Kuroo.

“I’m saying that it’s about why you fought. Try being a little bit more honest with yourself, you care about this game just as much as we all do,” Kuroo said. “I know that you had a private conversation with Daichi and he gave you the option to be a substitute player and sit this one out, and you declined.” He smiled triumphantly as if he had revealed one of Kei’s deepest secrets.

He wouldn’t have expected Daichi to pass on what they had discussed, but Kuroo was the vice-captain after all, he should’ve known. “Fine. Yes, I want to play! There, I admitted it, are you happy now?”

Kuroo tilted his head to one side as if he was deep in thought. “Actually, yes,” he grinned. “But I’m not to person you should be telling this. I saw Yamaguchi around the greenhouse, so if you’re quick you can get there before he leaves.”

Kei didn’t bother to come up with a retort to Kuroo. He mumbled a quick ‘ _thanks’_ before he rushed down to the greenhouse as fast as he could. Of course that’s where Yamaguch would be. Besides Quidditch, he had always shown a great interest in herbology.

Kei didn’t know what he was going to say to him, but he was filled with determination. Usually it was the other way around, but he had a feeling that he would find the right words. He stormed past a horde of first-years outside, towards the green house. Yamaguchi always helped out and tended to the plants whenever he could.

 He slowed down once only a few metres separated him and the door into the greenhouse. When Kei was so close that he could touch the door, he stopped. He got weak in the knees and his hands were sweaty. All he had to do was push the door open. He reached for the doorknob and almost gripped it, when a thought hit him out of nowhere. What if Yamaguchi didn’t want to reconcile with him? What if he was done with Kei? Kei bit his lip. He would never know if he didn’t ask, so what other options did he have. He gripped the doorknob and was about to push it, when the door was pulled open.

Yamaguchi was on the other side, the pout on his face was gone and he looked tired. He didn’t directly look at Kei. “I saw you standing there and waiting, so I figured you might want to come in.”

Kei looked at Yamaguchi with big eyes. He was talking to him! That was an unexpected turn that he wasn’t prepared for. Kei had expected to persuade him to even listen to what he had to say.

Yamaguchi walked back inside and Kei followed him silently to one of the tables. Plants were spilling over the edges, rustling and screeching in every corner. Kei almost tripped over a thorny vine.

“I need to prune these,” Yamaguchi said with a distant voice. “Meanwhile can say whatever you have to say and I’ll listen.”

Kei leaned against the table next to his. The late afternoon sun was shining soft light through the milky glass of the greenhouse. Yamaguchi was hunched over a bunch of plants, his hair was in a half-ponytail again. Kei wanted nothing more than to pull the hair tie out of his hair and running his fingers through it, while Yamaguchi leaned onto him. _God, he missed him so much._

“The first thing I should start with is, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry,” Kei said. There was a weight pressing down on his chest that made it hard to breathe. “I was the one at fault, and I’m the worst for making you feel as frustrated and disappointed as you are.”

Yamaguchi didn’t say anything, but Kei could tell that he was listening by the way he clenched his fists. He knew that Yamaguchi would never let his anger out on the plants, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t there.

“I saw you training with Hinata and it made me realize that you could’ve asked anyone out of the team, but you still chose me to drag down to the Quidditch court. And…”, Kei took a deep breath,” I was wrong. About Slytherin. I don’t think we stand no chance and that practicing is pointless.”

Kei leaned a bit forward to see Yamaguchi’s reaction. He was facing the plants, so he couldn’t see his expression. In that moment Yamaguchi got up and finally he looked him in the eyes.

“You! You are so busy, making sure that everyone knows _how much_ you don’t care, so just in case it doesn’t work out you can’t get hurt! But you do care, just as much as all of us, and you get hurt as well.” Yamaguchi took his gloves off and threw them on the ground. There was a short silence, before he started talking again, this time in a softer voice. “Sometimes I don’t understand you. You can be honest with me, just how I am with you. You don’t have to pretend to care or not to care about anything, especially when I can tell it’s not true.”

“I’m sorry,” Kei repeated. He wanted to take a step forward and reach for Yamaguchi, but he hesitated.

Yamaguchi pushed a few strands of hair that were hanging in his face to the side. “Tsukki, I just don’t want to be left guessing what you’re thinking all the time. It’s frustrating. I don’t demand you share one hundred percent of your thoughts with me, but you make me feel like you have no faith in me.”

“No, that’s not the case. I trust you.” He looked at the floor as he continued talking. “I trust you like nobody else.” Kei had never thought that he’d be telling this to Yamaguchi, but the words just spilled out of him without a filter.

Yamaguchi looked at him with sad eyes. “I believe you, but – “He stopped in his tracks and gritted his teeth in pain.

Kei swallowed hard. He didn’t know he had caused Yamaguchi so much pain. “I don’t know what I can do right now, except for apologize. Please don’t look so hurt.”

“I just got bitten by the Fanged Geranium,” Yamaguchi replied dryly.

“Oh.” Kei replied dumbfoundedly. “Oh god!”

He looked to Yamaguchi’s left and the Fanged Geranium he had been pruning was still biting into Yamaguchi’s hand. “What should I do? How do I make it let go?” He looked at Yamaguchi in panic, waiting for his instructions, his wand ready.

Yamaguchi leaned forward and pressed a spot on the plant’s stem and it let go by itself. “I already got it, see?” His hand was bleeding heavily.

Kei’s mind was blank, it was like someone had wiped every single spell from his memory. What was he supposed to do next? “Hold your hand up high, while I look for a cloth to wrap around your hand. Is their bite poisonous?” He ran through the green house in panic but there was nothing but dirty rags.

“No, I don’t think they are poisonous.”

“You don’t _think_?” Kei replied with a slightly higher voice than usual. He was running out of options, there was only one way to do this.

“Tsukki, why are you taking your shirt off?”

“We don’t have anything else around, that won’t give you an infection or even worse.” He wrapped his shirt around Yamaguchi’s hand, aware of the redness in his cheeks. Wasn’t this way too cheesy?

He walked Yamaguchi to the hospital wing, wearing Yamaguchi’s jacket, so nobody could see that he wasn’t wearing a shirt underneath. They were told that it wasn’t a big deal and they could heal him on the spot, but Kei wasn’t allowed to stay. Instead he was brooding in the common room, trying not to think of all the things that could go wrong, while he waited for Yamaguchi to return.  

Fifteen painfully long minutes passed, when the door opened and Yamaguchi walked in, his hand bandaged up.

Kei jumped up from his seat next to the fireplace and rushed to him. “Is your hand alright?”

“My hand is fine, they healed it completely but I should keep it wrapped for today just to make sure,” Yamaguchi said. “I’m still mad at you, by the way. Don’t you think I forgot that.”

Right, they were fighting before the Geranium bit Yamaguchi. Kei looked around but the common room was empty. Of course there could still be someone in the bedrooms. Kei didn’t want to give them another reason to talk about. “Hey, would you mind if we continued this conversation somewhere more private?”

Yamaguchi tried to look sceptical but Kei could see his expression getting softer. His heart skipped a beat. “Sure, how about we go for a walk outside?” The sun was about to set so they still had a few minutes of sunshine.

 

* * *

 

They wanted to walk around but they ended up sitting underneath the next best tree that they spotted.

The grass was soft and Kei let his hands run through it, while he thought of how to continue where they had left off. “I…you said that I should be more honest. I’m going to work on that. Really.”

Yamaguchi nodded. “Alright.” He watched the Quidditch players practicing in the distance. Ironically it was the Slytherin team that was playing.

“Alright?” Kei responded. “So…we’re back together?” He had to ask. He needed to hear it from Yamaguchi himself.

Yamaguchi tore his gaze away from the players in the distance and blinked at Kei a few times. “You thought we broke up?”

“We didn’t? You were _so_ mad, I thought you broke with me there.”

“No, I’d definitely tell you if that were the case,” Yamaguchi’s voice had lost its edge completely. It had returned to the way Kei had known it for over a decade. “I just wanted you to think about what I was so angry about, and why.”

“I did.”

Yamaguchi smiled. “Yes, you did.”

The familiar warmth that Kei always thought of, when Yamaguchi came to his mind, was back. He hadn’t seen him smile in days. “Can I…hold your hand?” Kei asked.

Now Yamaguchi laughed. “Since when did you get so formal?”

“You just hurt your hand. I’m trying to be attentive but you can’t be in much pain anymore if you already forgot.” He slipped Yamaguchi’s hand in his, but he held it gently like it was made of glass.

Yamaguchi was still smiling and rested his head on Kei’s shoulder. “I missed you,” he mumbled next to Kei’s ear, making him blush like it was the easiest thing in the world.

Kei planted a soft kiss on Yamaguchi’s forehead, before he leaned his head onto Yamaguchi’s. “Me too.”

They kept watching the players dash from one side of the Quidditch field to the other. “Let’s beat their asses in the next match,” Kei eventually said.

“You bet we will.”

**Author's Note:**

> Phew, this got a lot more angsty than planned;;  
> I hope you enjoyed it, I'll make up for it with lots of fluff in the next one (I promise).


End file.
